Most Popular Books by Terry Pratchett

The newest entry in Pratchett''s internationally bestselling series is a splendid send-up of government, the postal system, and everything that lies in between.

For more than two decades, Terry Pratchett has been regaling readers with tales of Discworld—a flat world balanced on the backs of four elephants, which are standing on the back of a giant turtle, flying through space. It is a world populated by ineffectual wizards and sharp-as-tacks witches, by tired policemen and devious dictators, by reformed thieves and vampires who have sworn to drink no blood. It is a world that is vastly different from our own . . . except when it isn''t. Now, in The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld, various nuggets of Pratchett''s witty commentary and sagacious observations have been compiled by Pratchett expert Stephen Briggs, a man who, they say, knows even more about Discworld than Terry Pratchett. Within these pages, you''ll find musings on: Interior decorating: "It''s a fact known throughout the universes that no matter how carefully the colors are chosen, institutional decor ends up as either vomit green, unmentionable brown, nicotine yellow, or surgical appliance pink. By some little-understood process of sympathetic resonance, corridors painted in those colors always smell slightly of boiled cabbage—even if no cabbage is ever cooked in the vicinity." (Equal Rites) Travel: "Any seasoned traveler soon learns to avoid anything wished on them as a ''regional speciality,'' because all the term means is that the dish is so unpleasant the people living everywhere else will bite off their own legs rather than eat it. But hosts still press it upon distant guests anyway: ''Go on, have the dog''s head stuffed with macerated cabbage and pork noses—it''s a regional speciality.''" (The Last Continent) Young men: "And then there was the young male walk. At least women swung only their hips. Young men swung everything, from the shoulders down. You have to try to occupy a lot of space. It makes you look bigger, like a tomcat fluffing his tail. The boys tried to walk big in self-defense against all those other big boys out there. I''m bad, I''m fierce, I''m cool, I''d like a pint of shandy and me mam wants me home by nine." (Monstrous Regiment) Class: "''Old money'' meant that it had been made so long ago that the black deeds that had originally filled the coffers were now historically irrelevant. Funny, that; a brigand for a father was something you kept quiet about, but a slave-taking pirate for a great-great-great-grandfather was something to boast of over the port. Time turned the evil bastards into rogues, and rogue was a word with a twinkle in its eye and nothing to be ashamed of." (Making Money) . . . and more! Culled from all the Discworld novels, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld confirms Pratchett''s place in the pantheon of great satirists and proves why the Chicago Tribune has praised his Discworld as "entertaining and gloriously funny . . . an accomplishment nothing short of magical."

Be careful what you wish for... Once upon a time there was a fairy godmother named Desiderata who had a good heart, a wise head, and poor planning skills—which unforunately left the Princess Emberella in the care of her other (not quite so good and wise) godmother when DEATH came for Desiderata. So now it''s up to Magrat Garlick, Granny Weatherwax, and Nanny Ogg to hop on broomsticks and make for far-distant Genua to ensure the servant girl doesn''t marry the Prince. But the road to Genua is bumpy, and along the way the trio of witches encounters the occasional vampire, werewolf, and falling house (well this is a fairy tale, after all). The trouble really begins once these reluctant foster-godmothers arrive in Genua and must outwit their power-hungry counterpart who''ll stop at nothing to achieve a proper "happy ending"—even if it means destroying a kingdom.

The possibilities are endless. (Just be careful what you wish for. . . .) 1916: The Western Front. Private Percy Blakeney wakes up. He is lying on fresh spring grass. He can hear birdsong and the wind in the leaves. Where have the mud, blood, and blasted landscape of no-man''s-land gone? For that matter, where has Percy gone? 2015: Madison, Wisconsin. Police officer Monica Jansson is exploring the burned-out home of a reclusive—some say mad, others allege dangerous—scientist who seems to have vanished. Sifting through the wreckage, Jansson finds a curious gadget: a box containing some rudimentary wiring, a three-way switch, and . . . a potato. It is the prototype of an invention that will change the way humankind views the world forever. The first novel in an exciting new collaboration between Discworld® creator Terry Pratchett and the acclaimed SF writer Stephen Baxter, The Long Earth transports readers to an infinity of new worlds. All it takes is a single step. . . .

The Heroine: Tiffany Aching, incipient witch and cheese maker extraordinaire. Once saved world from Queen of the Elves. Is about to discover that battling evil monarchs is child''s play compared to mortal combat with a Hiver (see below). At eleven years old, is boldest heroine ever to have confronted the Forces of Darkness while armed with a frying pan. The Threat: A Hiver, insidious disembodied presence drawn to powerful magic. highly dangerous, frequently lethal. Cannot be stopped with iron or fire. Its target: Tiffany Aching (see above). The Nac Mac Feegle: A.k.a. the Wee Free Men. Height: six inches. Color: blue. Famed for drinking, stealing, and fighting. Will attack anything larger than themselves. Members include: Rob Anybody, Daft Wullie, and Awfully Wee Billy Bigchin. Allies to Tiffany Aching (see above). The Book: Hilarious, breathtaking, spine-tingling sequel to the acclaimed Wee Free Men. The Author: Terry Pratchett, celebrated creator of the internationally best-selling Discworld series. Carnegie Medalist and writer extraordinaire.

The eighth Discworld novel — After this, dragons will never be the same again! This is where the dragons went. They lie . . . not dead, not asleep, but . . . dormant. And although the space they occupy isn’t like normal space, nevertheless they are packed in tightly. They could put you in mind of a can of sardines, if you thought sardines were huge and scaly. And presumably, somewhere, there’s a key . . .

In the first of the Discworld series, the inept wizard Rincewind finds himself the reluctant escort of the Discworld''s first tourist, Twoflower, and his magical Luggage.

Terry Pratchett takes Shakespeare''s Macbeth and then turns it up ''till the knob comes off. It''s all there - a wicked duke and duchess, the ghost of the murdered king, dim soldiers, strolling players, a land in peril. And who stands between the Kingdom and destruction? Three witches. Granny Weatherwax (intolerant, self-opinionated, powerful), Nanny Ogg (down-to-earth, vulgar) and Magrat Garlick (naive, fond of occult jewellery and bunnies). Stephen Briggs has been involved in amateur dramatics for over 25 years and he assures us that the play can be staged without needing the budget of Industrial Light and Magic. Not only that, but the cast should still be able to be in the pub by 10 o''clock! Oh, and a world of advice omitted from the play text- LEARN THE WORDS Havelock, Lord Vetinari

According to The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (the world''s only completely accurate book of prophecies, written in 1655, before she exploded), the world will end on a Saturday. Next Saturday, in fact. Just before dinner. So the armies of Good and Evil are amassing, Atlantis is rising, frogs are falling, tempers are flaring. Everything appears to be going according to Divine Plan. Except a somewhat fussy angel and a fast-living demon—both of whom have lived amongst Earth''s mortals since The Beginning and have grown rather fond of the lifestyle—are not actually looking forward to the coming Rapture. And someone seems to have misplaced the Antichrist . . .

“Pratchett’s Monty Python-like plots are almost impossible to describe. His talent for characterization and dialogue and his pop-culture allusions steal the show.”—Chicago Tribune No sacred cow is left unskewered in this intriguing installment in Sir Terry Pratchett''s internationally bestselling Discworld series, a divinely funny take on organized religion, petty gods, and the corrupting thirst for power. Religion is a competitive business in the Discworld. Everyone has their own opinion and their own gods of every shape and size—all fighting for faith, followers, and a place at the top. So when the great god Om accidentally manifests as a lowly tortoise, stripped of all divine power, it’s clear he’s become less important than he realized. Om needs an acolyte and fast. Enter Brutha, the Chosen One—or at least the only One available. He’s a simple lad whose highest ambition is tending his melon patch—until he hears the voice of a god calling his name. A small god for sure. But bossy as Hell. Brutha wants peace, justice, and love—but that’s hard to achieve in a world where religion means power, money is worshipped, and corruption reigns supreme. . . . The Discworld novels can be read in any order but Small Gods is a standalone.

Not just another science book and not just another Discworld novella, The Science of Discworld is a creative, mind-bending mash-up of fiction and fact, that offers a wizard’s-eye view of our world that will forever change how you look at the universe. Can Unseen University’s eccentric wizards and orangutan Librarian possibly shed any useful light on hard, rational Earthly science? In the course of an exciting experiment, the wizards of Discworld have accidentally created a new universe. Within this universe is a planet that they name Roundworld. Roundworld is, of course, Earth, and the universe is our own. As the wizards watch their creation grow, Terry Pratchett and acclaimed science writers Ian Stewart and Jack Cohen use Discworld to examine science from the outside. Interwoven with the Pratchett’s original story are entertaining, enlightening chapters which explain key scientific principles such as the Big Bang theory and the evolution of life on earth, as well as great moments in the history of science.

As autumn fogs hold Ankh-Morpok in their grip, the City Watch must find a murderer who can''t be seen. The golems may know something, but they''ve all started to commit suicide. And on top of all this, the Watch have other problems to deal with, such as a werewolf suffering from Pre-Lunar Tension.

From the pen of Sir Terry Pratchett, beloved and bestselling author of the Discworld fantasy series, comes time-travel adventure that mixes outrageous humor and nail-biting suspense! Twelve-year-old Johnny Maxwell has a knack for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. This has never been more true than when he finds himself in his hometown on May 21, 1941, over forty years before his birth! An accidental time traveler, Johnny knows his history. He knows England is at war, and he knows that on this day German bombs will fall on the town. It happened. It''s history. And as Johnny and his friends quickly discover, tampering with history can have unpredictable—and drastic—effects on the future. But letting history take its course means letting people die. What if Johnny warns someone and changes history? What will happen to the future? If Johnny uses his knowledge to save innocent lives by being in the right place at the right time, is he doing the right thing? Read more of Johnny Maxwell''s adventures in Only You Can Save Mankind and Johnny and the Dead!

They''re four inches tall in a human-sized world. Under the floorboards of the Store is a world of four-inch-tall nomes that humans never see. It is commonly known among these nomes that Arnold Bros. created the Store for them to live in, and he declared: "Everything Under One Roof." Therefore there can be no such thing as Outside. It just makes sense. That is, until the day a group of nomes arrives on a truck, claiming to be from Outside, talking about Day and Night and Snow and other crazy legends. And they soon uncover devastating news: The Store is about to be demolished. It''s up to Masklin, one of the Outside nomes, to devise a daring escape plan that will forever change the nomes'' vision of the world. . . .

The seventh book in the award-winning comic fantasy Discworld series by Terry Pratchett. Unlike most teenaged boys, Teppic isn''t chasing girls and working at the mall. Instead he''s just inherited the throne of the desert kingdom Djelibeybi—a job that''s come a bit earlier than he expected (a turn of fate his recently departed father wasn''t too happy about either). It''s bad enough being new on the job, but Teppic hasn''t a clue as to what a pharaoh is supposed to do. After all, he''s been trained at Ankh-Morpork''s famed assassins'' school, across the sea from the Kingdom of the Sun. First, there''s the monumental task of building a suitable resting place for Dad—a pyramid to end all pyramids. Then there are the myriad administrative duties, such as dealing with mad priests, sacred crocodiles, and marching mummies. And to top it all off, the adolescent pharaoh discovers deceit and betrayal—not to mention a headstrong handmaiden—at the heart of his realm. Sometimes being a god is no fun at all. . . .

For every Pratchett fan, the must-have fully updated guidebook to Discworld! The Discworld, as everyone knows, is a flat world balanced on the backs of four elephants that, in turn, stand on the shell of the giant star turtle, the Great A''Tuin, as it slowly swims through space. It is also a global publishing phenomenon, with sales of about eighty-five million books worldwide. The publication of Snuff brought the Discworld canon to thirty-nine books—not including the various guides, maps, diaries, and other side projects. That''s a lot of Discworld to keep track of—more than most people can manage with just one head—but fear not: help is at hand! If you''re looking for the ultimate authority on probably the most heavily populated—certainly the most hilarious—setting in fantasy literature . . . If you need a handy guide to Discworld locales from Ankh-Morpork to Zemphis . . . If you want help telling Achmed the Mad from Jack Zweiblumen . . . If your life depends on being able to distinguish the Agatean Empire from the Zoons . . . Look no further than Turtle Recall: The Discworld Companion . . . So Far—now fully updated and completely up to Snuff!

Another brilliant installment in Terry Pratchett''s acclaimed Discworld series, "The novel exudes the curious feel of old-fashioned vampire and Frankenstein legends. . . . Pratchett lampoons everything from Christian superstition to Swiss Army knives here, proving that the fantasy satire of Discworld ''still ate''nt dead.''" — Publishers Weekly King Verence, in a fit of enlightened democracy and ebullient goodwill, invites Uberwald''s undead, the Magpyrs, into Lancre to celebrate the birth of his daughter. But everyone knows you don''t invite vampires into your house, even stylish, sophisticated ones with fancy waistcoats — unless you want permanent guests. Once ensconced within the castle, these wine-drinking, garlic-eating, sun-loving modern vampires have no intention of leaving . . . ever. Standing between the Magpyr family and Lancre are a coven of four: Granny Weatherwax, Nanny Ogg, Magrat, and young Agness. And as the Lancre living are about to discover, there''s only one way to fight. Go for the throat, or as the vampyres themselves say . . . Carpe Jugulum! The Discworld novels can be read in any order but Carpe Jugulum is the sixth in the Witches collection. The Witches includes: Equal Rites Wyrd Sisters Witches Abroad Lords and Ladies Maskerade Carpe Jugulum

New York Times Bestseller! This never-before-published collection of fourteen funny and inventive tales by acclaimed author Sir Terry Pratchett, creator of the beloved and bestselling Discworld fantasy series, features a memorable cast of inept wizards, sensible heroes, and unusually adventuresome tortoises. Including more than one hundred black-and-white illustrations, the appealingly designed book celebrates Pratchett’s inimitable wordplay and irreverent approach to the conventions of storytelling. These accessible and mischievous tales are an ideal introduction for young readers to this beloved author. Established fans of Pratchett’s work will savor the playful presentation of the themes and ideas that inform his popular novels. Read more of Sir Terry''s silliest stories in The Witch''s Vacuum Cleaner!

It''s a game of Trolls and Dwarfs where the player must take both sides to win ... It''s the noise a troll club makes when crushing in a dwarf skull, or when a dwarfish axe cleaves a trollish cranium ... It''s the unsettling sound of history about to repeat itself ... THUD! It''s the most extraordinary, outrageous, provocative, insightful, and keenly cutting flight of fancy yet from Discworld''s incomparable supreme creator ... Terry Pratchett Commander Sam Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch admits he may not be the sharpest knife in the cutlery drawer—he might not even be a spoon. But he''s dogged and honest and he''ll be damned if he lets anyone disturb his city''s always-tentative peace—and that includes a rabble-rousing dwarf from the sticks (or deep beneath them) who''s been stirring up big trouble on the eve of the anniversary of one of Discworld''s most infamous historical events. Centuries earlier, in a gods-forsaken hellhole called Koom Valley, a horde of trolls met a division of dwarfs in bloody combat. Though nobody''s quite sure why they fought or who actually won, hundreds of years on each species still bears the cultural scars, and one views the other with simmering animosity and distrust. Lately, an influential dwarf, Grag Hamcrusher, has been fomenting unrest among Ankh-Morpork''s more diminutive citizens with incendiary speeches. And it doesn''t help matters when the pint-size provocateur is discovered beaten to death ... with a troll club lying conveniently nearby. Vimes knows the well-being of his smoldering city depends on his ability to solve the Hamcrusher homicide without delay. (Vimes''s secondmost-pressing responsibility, in fact, next to being home every evening at six sharp to read Where''s My Cow? to Young Sam.) Whatever it takes to unstick this very sticky situation, Vimes will do it—even tolerate having a vampire in the Watch. But there''s more than one corpse waiting for him in the eerie, summoning darkness of the vast, labyrinthine mine network the dwarfs have been excavating in secret beneath Ankh-Morpork''s streets. A deadly puzzle is pulling Sam Vimes deep into the muck and mire of superstition, hatred, and fear—and perhaps all the way to Koom Valley itself.

This special e-book edition of The Color of Magic includes an excerpt of Terry Pratchett’s latest novel, Snuff! Terry Pratchett''s profoundly irreverent, bestselling novels have garnered him a revered position in the halls of parody next to the likes of Mark Twain, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams, and Carl Hiaasen. The Color of Magic is Terry Pratchett''s maiden voyage through the now-legendary land of Discworld. This is where it all begins -- with the tourist Twoflower and his wizard guide, Rincewind.

THE FAIRIES ARE BACK - BUT THIS TIME THEY DON''T JUST WANT YOUR TEETH... Granny Weatherwax and her tiny coven are up against real elves. It''s Midsummer Night. No times for dreaming... With full supporting cast of dwarfs, wizards, trolls, Morris dancers and one orang-utan. And lots of hey-nonny-nonny and blood all over the place.

Sam Vimes is a man on the run. Yesterday he was a duke, a chief of police and the ambassador to the mysterious, fat-rich country of Uberwald. Now he has nothing but his native wit and the gloomy trousers of Uncle Vanya (don’t ask). It’s snowing. It’s freezing. And there are monsters on his trail . . .

“Unadulterated fun.”—San Francisco Chronicle The fate of Ankh-Morpork rests on the unlikely shoulders of newly promoted Corporal Carrot and his hapless charges in the City Watch in this wildly wacky Discworld novel from the legendary New York Times bestselling author Terry Pratchett. Corporal Carrot is now in charge of the new recruits guarding Ankh-Morpork from barbarian rribes, miscellaneous marauders, unlicensed thieves, and other dangerous Discworld denizens. It’s a big job for an adopted dwarf keeping the likes of young coppers Lance-constable Cuddy (really a dwarf), Lance-constable Detritus (a troll), Lance-constable Angua (a woman. . . most of the time) and Corporal Nobbs (disqualified from the human race for shoving) in line. Especially since someone in Ankh-Morpork has been getting dangerous ideas about crowns and legendary swords, and destiny—which points its crooked finger again when an ancient document reveals that Ankh-Morpork has a secret sovereign. What''s more, Captain Sam Vimes is getting married and retiring from the Watch. For good. Which is a shame, because no one knows the streets of Ankh-Morpork or its criminal underworld better than him. It’s the beginning of the most awesome epic encounter of all time (or at least all afternoon), in which the fate of a city—indeed of the universe itself!—depends on a young man’s courage, an ancient sword’s magic, and a three-legged poodle’s bladder. The Discworld novels can be read in any order but Men at Arms is the 2nd in the City Watch collection and the 15th Discworld book. The City Watch series in order: Guards! Guards! Men at Arms Feet of Clay Jingo The Fifth Elephant Night Watch Thud! Snuff

The inimitable author of the bestselling Discworld series brings to life a reality-bending tale of aliens, war, and virtual heroism, as 12-year-old Johnny Maxwell discovers that the boundary between war and war games is perilously thin.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON, AS MURDER, MUSIC AND MAYHEM RUN RIOT IN THE NIGHT...The Opera House, Ankh-Morpork...a huge, rambling building, where innocent young sopranos are lured to their destiny by a strangely-familiar eveil mastermind in a hideously-deformed

A sumptuous illustrated journey through Pratchett''s bestselling Discworld universe, this lavish full-color volume is the ultimate holiday gift for the legions of fans.

"Your grandfather is Death," said Albert. "You Know? The skeleton in the black robe?" "Death," said Susan flatly. "Well, I can''t say I didn''t have my suspicions." Other children have xylophones. Susan just had to ask her grandfather to take his vest off. Yes. There''s a death in the family. It''s hard to grow up normally when Grandfather rides a white horse and wields a scythe - especially when you have to take over the family business, and everyone mistakes you for the Tooth Fairy. And especially when you have to face the new and addictive music that has entered the Discworld. It''s lawless. It''s changes people. It''s called Music With Rocks In. It''s got a beat and you can dance to it, but... It''s alive. And it won''t fade away.

A Discworld novel in which the alchemists discover the magic of the silver screen, and attempt to unravel the dark secret of Holy Wood Hill.

When their home, a large department store, was demolished, thousands of tiny nomes made a daring and dramatic escape on a stolen lorry - and only just in time. The abandoned quarry they have found is perfect for their needs but strange things begin to happen and their new home is under threat.