New Releases by Alan Katz

Get ready to laugh your way through the school day! NY Times bestselling author and funny man Alan Katz presents 200+ jokes, silly stories and amusing activities that will have you rolling on the floor laughing! NY Times Alan Katz is back with this third book in his bestselling joke book line for kids. Packed with jokes, silly stories and funny original line art on every page, this book is sure to keep kids cackling all the way to the cafeteria!

Alan Katz''s funniest jokes for school ever! Alan Katz''s funniest jokes for school, all in one book!

Bet you can''t read the whole thing without laughing! These animal jokes will have you rolling on the floor laughing! Why was the baby snake upset? Because someone took his rattle. What did the fast food worker say when the frog ordered a hamburger? "Do you want flies with that?" Get ready to BARK out loud with these hilarious animal jokes from author and expert funny man Alan Katz! Including knock-knock jokes and puns for all situations, The Funniest Animal Joke Book Ever has it all! It even includes activities and fill-in sections to write your own jokes!

"It''s that time in the Passover Seder when it''s Grandpa Murray''s job to break the matzoh and hide the afikomen for the kids to find. But what happens when you hide the afikomen too well? Search as hard as they can, Nathan, Simone, Andrew, and David can''t track it down anywhere. The kids may have to turn the house upside down if they want to get their reward and finish the Seder meal."--

Try not to laugh! Jokes for kids so funny they''ll have you on the ground in no time! I crossed a fish with an elephant. What did you get? Swim trunks! Who’s a golfer’s favorite wizard? Harry Putter! Careful, the jokes in this book are so funny you might just laugh your socks off! From knock knocks to puns a plenty, The Funniest Joke Book Ever For Kids is positively overflowing with funny! It even has activities and fill-in-the-blanks for making your very own jokes. Can you read the whole thing without laughing? Bet you can''t! It''s all brought to you by author and funny man Alan Katz.

A llama astronaut! A grilled-cheese cheetah! A quarterback yak! It''s Halloween at the zoo, and it''s time for the animals to show off their costumes! But who will win the prize for best dressed? This night is full of fun and surprises! Children and parents alike will love this festive story by beloved New York Times bestselling author Alan Katz, brought to life with delightfully vibrant illustrations by acclaimed artist Stephanie Laberis.

The Elf Academy elves take on babysitting in this fourth and final book in a series about a young elf’s merry misadventures, part of the Aladdin QUIX line of fun-to-read, short chapter books that’s perfect for emerging readers! Andy Snowden has to take care of his teacher’s niece and nephew who are moving to the North Pole. Has he finally met his mischievous match?

"Becky loves Grandpa Max. When he visits, they have a lot of fun together. But when Grandpa Max pulls his favorite prank on Becky, he accidentally takes her nose--for real! OH NO! Now Becky and Grandpa Max have to chase Becky''s runny nose all over town--or else, who nose what will happen? With vibrant art and hilarious wordplay, children, parents, and grandparents alike will love the funny, fast-paced picture book tale."--Publisher marketing.

The Elf Academy elves throw a surprise party for Santa in this third book in a series about a young elf’s merry misadventures, part of the Aladdin QUIX line of fun-to-read, short chapter books that’s perfect for emerging readers! The elves decide to throw a super-duper surprise party for Santa, complete with gifts, treats, and decorations! Andy Snowden has a million and one ideas to make the party the best one ever. What could possibly go wrong?

The Elf Academy elves go on a field trip in this second book in a series about a young elf’s merry misadventures, part of the Aladdin QUIX line of fun-to-read, short chapter books that’s perfect for emerging readers! Andy Snowden and the other Elf Academy elves go on a winter wonderland field trip. When one of the younger reindeer is having trouble learning to fly, it’s up to Andy to use his imagination to help save the day!

Travel to the North Pole in this first book in a brand-new series about a young elf’s merry misadventures, part of the Aladdin QUIX line of fun-to-read, short chapter books that’s perfect for emerging readers! Andy Snowden is one of the many North Pole elves who make holiday gifts for children all around the world. But day after day, week after week, Andy starts to grow tired of the same old routine. He knows he’s destined for a different path than the other elves. But what else can a North Pole elf be good at? Maybe the Elf Academy Toy Making Contest can help Andy discover a special hidden talent!

Just when you thought they’d moved out for good… Being a mommy is great. So is being a daddy. But do you know what’s even better? Being an empty nester. Oh, the joys of watching a fully raised child sprout wings and move away. Until the horrifying day… That child comes back. Goodbye tranquility. Goodbye cleanliness. Goodbye leftover meatloaf. It’s a fact that 52% of millennials are living in their parents’ homes. Get the H*** Out of My House is picture book for the parents who hoped, thought and prayed they’d be empty nesters. It’s a way to tell them they’re not alone in having those hopes dashed, thoughts dismissed and prayers unanswered. If that’s you, don’t despair. Just read this book, and keep the faith. And if you’re the millennial who’s moved back, buy them this book…then get the hell out of their house!

"Oh, no! Noah, the classroom''s evil pet ferret, has stolen everyone''s lunch--and worse yet, he''s done it on a day when Milton''s mom, the class''s go-to super-sub, is off on another assignment. Will Milton be able to foil Noah''s most fiendish plot yet or will they lose their lunches for good in the gooiest, stickiest, biggest food fight ever?"--

If there’s a problem in school, there’s no substitute for the world-saving substitute teachers of the S.O.S.! This is the first book of this hilarious, highly illustrated early chapter book series. When Milton Worthy learns his classroom’s pet ferret is the evil mastermind behind a dastardly plot for world domination, it’s more than just about any kid could handle. But then not every kid is the son of a member of the super-secret, super-awesome Society of Substitutes! Now it’s up to Milton and his substitute teacher mom to save Beacher Elementary School before time runs out. HarperChapters build confident readers one chapter at a time! With short, fast-paced books, art on every page, and milestone markers at the end of every chapter, they''re the perfect next step for fans of I Can Read!

Amelia Earhart, top aviator. You might know that her flight accomplishments were heralded across the globe. But what about the story of her teeth, which were so perfect that her dentist wanted to remove all of them to show his other patients? Or her refusal to read chapter nine in any book? You’re about to be treated to the Lieographical aspects of Amelia Earhart’s life, in this funny, lighthearted, “all that didn’t happen” take on this larger than life woman. The book ends with a short—but true—account of Amelia’s life—just enough to encourage kids to find out more on this important historical figure. But even if readers have already learned about Amelia, the wacky stories in this tall-tales book will be even more enjoyable.

Thomas Edison, world-class inventor. You might know that he devised the electric light bulb and the phonograph. But what about his development of train-controlling sticks? Or his airborne way to send pancakes to his Cousin Fran in Texas? You’re about to be treated to the Lieographical aspects of Thomas Edison’s life, in this funny, lighthearted, “all that didn’t happen” take on the man whose inventions transformed our daily existence. The book ends with a short—but true—account of Edison’s life—just enough to encourage kids to find out more on this important historical figure. But even if readers have already learned about Edison, the wacky stories in this tall-tales book will be even more enjoyable.

Babe Ruth, incredible ballplayer. You might know that he was widely considered baseball’s greatest hitter. But what about his feat of pitching to himself and blasting 25 straight home runs? Or his knack for removing kids’ spleens and kidneys despite not having any medical training? You’re about to be treated to the Lieographical aspects of Babe Ruth’s life, in this funny, lighthearted, “all that didn’t happen” take on this larger than life man. The book ends with a short—but true—account of Babe’s life—just enough to encourage kids to find out more on this important historical figure. But even if readers have already learned about the Babe, the wacky stories in this tall-tales book will be even more enjoyable.

Laugh along with this big-hearted collection of ridiculous stories and playful puns -- perfect for fans of Rob Elliott and Jon Scieska. A collection of twenty outrageously funny short stories for younger middle grade readers, Really Stupid Stories for Really Smart Kids is full of puns, "bad" jokes, and tall tales that will have you rolling on the floor with laughter. From "snowpeople" falling from the sky to a boy who only communicates through singing, there''s a story for every fan of Alan Katz''s signature humor.

Part of a super fun middle grade series, Awesome Achievers in Science puts the spotlight on lesser-known heroes and their contributions in major scientific fields. Everyone has heard the names Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin, but what about Michael Collins--the third brave Apollo 11 astronaut who didn''t get to walk on the moon? Many of the most relevant figures in scientific history have remained in the shadows, but not any longer! From Alan Katz''s new Awesome Achievers series, Awesome Achievers in Science gives kids a look behind the scenes at 12 lesser-known scientists whose contributions are personally relevant to their lives today. Each figure is given a traditional biography but is also subject to Katz''s unique brand of silliness, with humorous elements such as imagined poems, song lyrics, and diary entries by or about the not-so-famous figure accompanying each bio. Spot illustrations throughout add to the lighthearted and appreciative humor each figure receives. Reluctant readers and budding scientists alike will delight in this imaginative and engaging continuation of a new series of laugh-out-loud biographies.

A father and son discuss the variety of outlandish items they might have if not for the other in this funny and heartfelt look at the appreciation we have for our families. There are tons of things a parent or child could have, if they didn’t have each other. A dad may be able to have a sleek sports car, and a son could have candy for every meal. But if to have those things, they wouldn’t have each other…well, they’d rather have their family instead. Kids and parents alike will find the humor in all the outlandish things they could have, but also the tenderness of knowing they have exactly what they need with each other.

Perfect for fans of Tom Angleberger and Dan Gutman, this hilarious story with black and white illustrations is the start of a series about trouble-making twins and their newest nanny--and his very impressive mustache!

Show and Tell in Mrs. Mueller''s classroom is full of wordplay--though not intentionally.

When Martin "Murray Poopins" Healey left the Wolfhardt household, all the responsible habits that David and Nathan had developed under his less-than-watchful eye went out the window. So when Myron, who is the spitting image (including the spit) of Martin, arrives on the Wolfhardt doorstep, he is instantly hired to watch Nathan and David. But Myron seems to know things that only Martin could have known, and before long Nathan and David are sure that something strange is going on with their mustachioed manny. As Myron takes them on wild adventures, the twins have their own agenda--to prove that Myron is Martin. But what if there''s really a Martin and Myron, and what if they both want the nanny job? Will Nathan and David get a double dose of nannying? Perfect for fans of Dan Gutman and Tom Angleberger, boys and girls will love the zany laugh-out-loud humor and fun illustrations found in every chapter.

Bestselling author Alan Katz, of Silly Dilly fame, knows kid humor, and he knows just what subjects are funniest—from school to siblings to sports, this assortment of spirited poetry has something for everyone. In the tradition of Shel Silverstein and Jack Prelutsky, with black-and-white illustrations throughout, this collection of more than 100 poems will have kids roaring with laughter!

Rocky Dachshund is back in an all-new first experience story from bestselling author Alan Katz and illustrator Pascal Lemaitre. This time, Rocky just won’t share! On the playground, he hogs the swings. He never passes the basketball during the game, and in art class he wants all the crayons and all the markers! Young readers are sure to giggle as this “me, mine” barker learns the importance of sharing in this humorous follow-up to Let’s Get a Checkup!

Alan Katz and David Catrow''s MOSQUITOES ARE RUINING MY SUMMER! offers song parodies for campers everywhere!

An energetic young boy has many things to do before he is ready to go to bed.

Bestselling author Alan Katz and illustrator Pascal Lemaitre bring the clever and adorable Rocky Dachshund to life in his first visit to the doctor!

Well-known songs, including "Oh Susannah" and "Take Me Out to the Ballgame," are presented with new words and titles, such as "Heavy Backpack!" and "I Don''t Want to Do Homework!"