New Release Books by Carl Hiaasen

Carl Hiaasen is the author of Squeeze Me (2020), Carl Hiaasen 5-Book Collection (2020), Squirm (2018), Razor Girl (2016), Tourist Season (2016) and other 118 books.

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Squeeze Me

release date: Sep 10, 2020
Squeeze Me
''Scabrous and unrelentingly hilarious . . . the Trump era is truly Carl Hiaasen''s moment'' WASHINGTON POST From the bestselling author of Bad Monkey and Razor Girl comes this hilarious new novel of social and political intrigue, set against the glittering backdrop of Florida''s gold coast. It''s the height of the Palm Beach charity ball season: for every good cause, there''s a reason for the local luminaries to eat (minimally), drink (maximally), and be seen. But when prominent high-society dowager Kiki Pew suddenly vanishes during a swanky gala, and is later found dead, panic and chaos erupt. Kiki was an ardent fan of the Winter White House resident just down the road, and a founding member of the POTUSSIES, a group of women dedicated to supporting their President - who immediately declares that Kiki was the victim of rampaging immigrant hordes. This, it turns out, is far from the truth. The truth might just lie in the middle of the highway, where a bizarre discovery brings the First Lady''s motorcade to a grinding halt. Enter Angie Armstrong, wildlife wrangler extraordinaire, who is summoned to the posh island to deal with a mysterious and impolite influx of huge, hungry pythons . . . Carl Hiaasen can brighten even the darkest of days and Squeeze Me is pure, unadulterated Hiaasen. Irreverent, ingenious, and highly entertaining, it perfectly captures the absurdity of our times. ''A comic genius'' EVENING STANDARD ''He has sky-high standards for elegance, crziness and mic-drop humor'' NEW YORK TIMES ''He always adds something extra to the mix . . . jauntiness, wit and larger-than-life characters'' SUNDAY EXPRESS

Carl Hiaasen 5-Book Collection

release date: Aug 18, 2020
Carl Hiaasen 5-Book Collection
This collection features five of Carl Hiaasen''s hilarious, award-winning classics! Take a trip to Carl Hiaasen''s Florida--where the animals are wild and the people are wilder--with this collection that includes Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp, and Squirm. Hoot: Everybody loves Mother Paula''s pancakes. Everybody, that is, except the cute but endangered owls that live on the building site of the new restaurant. Can the awkward new kid and his feral friend prank the pancake people out of town? Or is the owls'' fate cemented in pancake batter? Flush: The Coral Queen casino boat is treating the ocean like a toilet bowl, so Noah''s dad decides to sink the darn thing. Problem is, there''s no evidence of illegal dumping. Now Dad''s in the clink, the boat''s back in business, and only Noah can flush the truth out into the open. Scat: The most terrifying teacher in school is missing in the Everglades, and it''s up to Nick and Marta to find her. But first they''ll have to reckon with a junior arsonist, a wannabe Texas oilman, and a ticked-off Florida panther. It''s all about to hit the fan, and when it does, these kids better scat. Chomp: When Wahoo Cray''s dad--a professional animal wrangler--takes a job with a reality-TV survival show, Wahoo figures he''ll have to do a bit of wrangling himself to keep his father from killing the show''s inept and egotistical star. But the job keeps getting more complicated--and it isn''t just the animals who are ready to chomp. Squirm: This summer, Billy will fly across the country, hike a mountain, float a river, dodge a grizzly bear, shoot down a spy drone, save a neighbor''s cat, save an endangered panther, and then try to save his own father.

Squirm

release date: Sep 25, 2018
Squirm
A wildly entertaining adventure involving snakes, grizzlies, a menacing drone, a missing father, and the kid determined to find him. In classic Hiaasen fashion, the animals here are wild, and the people are wilder! Some facts about Billy Dickens: * He once saw a biker swerve across the road in order to run over a snake. * Later, that motorcycle somehow ended up at the bottom of a canal. * Billy isn''t the type to let things go. Some facts about Billy''s family: * They''ve lived in six different Florida towns because Billy''s mom insists on getting a house near a bald eagle nest. * Billy''s dad left when he was four and is a total mystery. * Billy has just found his dad''s address--in Montana. This summer, Billy will fly across the country, hike a mountain, float a river, dodge a grizzly bear, shoot down a spy drone, save a neighbor''s cat, save an endangered panther, and then try to save his own father. "A fun romp that will keep readers hooked." —The New York Times

Razor Girl

release date: Sep 06, 2016
Razor Girl
A lovable con woman and a disgraced detective team up to find a redneck reality TV star in this raucous and razor-sharp new novel from Carl Hiaasen, the bestselling author of Bad Monkey. Merry Mansfield, the eponymous Razor Girl, specializes in kidnapping for the mob. Her preferred method is rear-ending her targets and asking them for a ride. Her latest mark is Martin Trebeaux, owner of a private beach renourishment company who has delivered substandard sand to a mob hotel. But there''s just one problem: Razor Girl hits the wrong guy. Instead, she ends up with Lane Coolman, talent manager for Buck Nance, the star of a reality TV show about a family of Cajun rooster farmers. Buck Nance, left to perform standup at a Key West bar without his handler, makes enough off-color jokes to incite a brawl, then flees for his life and vanishes. Now a routine promotional appearance has become a missing persons case. And Andrew Yancy, disgraced detective-turned-health inspector, is on the job. That the Razor Girl may be the key to Yancy''s future will be as surprising to him as anything else he encounters along the way—including the giant Gambian pouched rats that are haunting his restaurant inspections.

Tourist Season

release date: Jan 01, 2016
Tourist Season
The first sign of trouble is a Shriner''s fez washed up on a Miami beach. The next is a suitcase containing the almost-legless body of the local chamber of commerce president found floating in a canal ... The locals are desperate to keep the murders under wraps and the tourist money flowing. But it will take a reporter-turned-private eye to make sense of a caper that mixes football players, politicians, and one very hungry crocodile in this classic mystery.

Skinny Dip

release date: Jan 01, 2016
Skinny Dip
Ex-police officer Mick Stranahan rescues a woman from the ocean. Joey Perrone''s husband tried to kill her by pushing her overboard from a cruise liner because he suspected that she had figured out his scam of doctoring water samples so that a ruthless agribusiness tycoon can illegally dump fertilizer into the endangered Everglades. Mick helps Joey haunt and taunt her homicidal husband.

Skink--No Surrender

release date: Sep 23, 2014
Skink--No Surrender
Richard''s cousin is missing, and his best hope of finding her rests with the wily, one-eyed, ex-governor of Florida. Carl Hiaasen introduces his iconic character Skink to a younger audience in this nail-biting adventure! A National Book Award Longlist Selection Classic Malley: her parents are about to ship her off to boarding school, so she takes off with some guy she met online... Poor Richard: he''s less of a rebel than Malley, and a lot less trusting. He knows his cousin is in trouble before she does. Wild Skink: he''s a ragged, one-eyed, ex-governor of Florida, and enough of a renegade to think he can track Malley down. With Richard riding shotgun, this unlikely pair scour the state, undaunted by blinding storms, crazed pigs, flying bullets, and giant gators. In Carl Hiaasen''s outrageous, hilarious, and wildly dangerous state of Florida, there are a million places an outlaw might stash a teenage girl. A million unpleasant ways to die. And two who will risk everything to rescue a friend . . . and to, hopefully, exact a bit of swamp justice.

Hoot Novel Units Student Packet

release date: Jul 15, 2019
Hoot Novel Units Student Packet
Activities to teach reading, thinking and writing.

Carl Hiaasen 4-Book Collection

release date: May 28, 2014
Carl Hiaasen 4-Book Collection
Discover the funny side of Florida with #1 New York Times bestselling author Carl Hiaasen in this collection of four books: Hoot, Flush, Scat and Chomp. "It''s classic Hiaasen—laugh-out-loud Satire in a Florida setting." —Life

Dance of the Reptiles

release date: Jan 28, 2014
Dance of the Reptiles
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER If you think the wildest, wackiest stories that Carl Hiaasen can tell have all made it into his hilarious, bestselling novels, think again. Dance of the Reptiles collects the best of Hiaasen’s Miami Herald columns, which lay bare the stories--large and small--that demonstrate anew that truth is far stranger than fiction. Hiaasen offers his commentary—indignant, disbelieving, sometimes righteously angry, and frequently hilarious—on burning issues like animal welfare, polluted rivers, and the broken criminal justice system as well as the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, Bernie Madoff''s trial, and the shenanigans of the recent presidential elections. Whether or not you have read Carl Hiaasen before, you are in for a wild ride.

Bad Monkey

release date: Jun 11, 2013
Bad Monkey
Andrew Yancy—late of the Miami Police and soon-to-be-late of the Monroe County sheriff’s office—has a human arm in his freezer. There’s a logical (Hiaasenian) explanation for that, but not for how and why it parted from its shadowy owner. Yancy thinks the boating-accident/shark-luncheon explanation is full of holes, and if he can prove murder, the sheriff might rescue him from his grisly Health Inspector gig (it’s not called the roach patrol for nothing). But first—this being Hiaasen country—Yancy must negotiate an obstacle course of wildly unpredictable events with a crew of even more wildly unpredictable characters, including his just-ex lover, a hot-blooded fugitive from Kansas; the twitchy widow of the frozen arm; two avariciously optimistic real-estate speculators; the Bahamian voodoo witch known as the Dragon Queen, whose suitors are blinded unto death by her peculiar charms; Yancy’s new true love, a kinky coroner; and the eponymous bad monkey, who with hilarious aplomb earns his place among Carl Hiaasen’s greatest characters. Here is Hiaasen doing what he does better than anyone else: spinning a tale at once fiercely pointed and wickedly funny in which the greedy, the corrupt, and the degraders of what’s left of pristine Florida—now, of the Bahamas as well—get their comeuppance in mordantly ingenious, diabolically entertaining fashion.

Basket Case

release date: Jan 01, 2013
Basket Case
Once a hotshot investigative reporter, middle-aged Jack Tagger now bangs out obituaries for a South Florida daily. When Jimmy Stoma, the infamous front man of Jimmy and the Slut Puppies, dies in a diving "accident, " Jack uses clues from the singer''s own music to unravel the mystery and resurrect his career in the process.

Chomp

release date: Mar 27, 2012
Chomp
In this hysterical #1 New York Times bestseller, one kid has to wrangle gators, snakes, bats that bite, and a reality show host gone rogue! This is Carl Hiaasen''s Florida—where the creatures are wild and the people are wilder! When Wahoo Cray’s dad—a professional animal wrangler—takes a job with a reality TV show called Expedition Survival!, Wahoo figures he''ll have to do a bit of wrangling himself to keep his father from killing Derek Badger, the show''s inept and egotistical star. But the job keeps getting more complicated: Derek Badger insists on using wild animals for his stunts; and Wahoo''s acquired a shadow named Tuna—a girl who''s sporting a shiner courtesy of her father and needs a place to hide out. They''ve only been on location in the Everglades for a day before Derek gets bitten by a bat and goes missing in a storm. Search parties head out and promptly get lost themselves. And then Tuna''s dad shows up with a gun . . . It''s anyone''s guess who will actually survive Expedition Survival. . . “Only in Florida—and in the fiction of its native son Carl Hiaasen—does a dead iguana fall from a palm tree and kill somebody.” —New York Post “Chomp is a delightful laugh-out-loud sendup of the surreality of TV that will be enjoyed by readers of all ages.” —Los Angeles Times

Powder Burn

release date: Dec 28, 2010
Powder Burn
A Miami hit-and-run witness winds up as bait for drug smugglers—in an “explosive” novel cowritten by the New York Times–bestselling author of Bad Monkey (The Atlanta Journal-Constitution). Chris Meadows’s charmed life as an up-and-coming architect in Coconut Grove has kept him far removed from Miami’s bloody drug trade. But his comfortable existence comes crashing down around him when Chris witnesses the hit-and-run death of an ex-girlfriend by a car full of drug smuggling gangsters. Now caught up in southern Florida’s brutal underground cocaine war, Meadows is in a fight for his life—to evade not only the hit men seeking to silence him, but also the crooked Miami cops who would rather exploit than protect him. This is the very first suspense thriller written by the New York Times–bestselling author of Razor Girl and Sick Puppy and Bill Montalbano, a writing team praised for its “fine flair for characters and settings” (Library Journal). Those who enjoy Hiaasen’s other Florida thrillers, the Doc Ford novels by Randy Wayne White, or Netflix’s Narcos will want to discover these early crime fiction gems.

Trap Line

release date: Dec 28, 2010
Trap Line
A Key West fishing captain takes on Florida’s drug lords in this “splendidly written” crime story coauthored by the #1 New York Times–bestselling novelist (The New York Times Book Review). Though he is one of Key West’s most skilled fishing captains, Breeze Albury barely ekes out a living on the meager earnings of his trade. Meanwhile, Cuban and Colombian drug smugglers thrive all around—and they have their sights set on Albury and his fishing boat. After the smugglers cut his three hundred trap lines and crush his livelihood, Albury is forced to run drugs to survive. But when he gets busted by the crooked chief of police and becomes a target of the drug machine’s brutal hit men, Albury becomes a vigilante on the seas of Florida, unleashing a fiery and relentless vengeance on the most dangerous criminals south of Miami. Along with Powder Burn and A Death in China, this is one of the early suspense thrillers written by Carl Hiaasen and Bill Montalbano, a writing team praised for their “fine flair for characters and settings” (Library Journal). Perfect for fans of the Doc Ford novels by Randy Wayne White, Trap Line is an action-packed preview of Hiaasen’s stellar Florida-set crime novels including Sick Puppy, Tourist Season, and Razor Girl.

A Death in China

release date: Dec 28, 2010
A Death in China
An American investigates a murder amid the secrecy and corruption of China in this crime thriller from the New York Times–bestselling author of Razor Girl. Art history professor Tom Stratton hasn’t seen his former mentor David Wang for years—until they unexpectedly run into each other while Stratton is on a guided tour of China. But the reunion doesn’t last long. After Wang is found dead—and the American embassy fumbles the investigation—Stratton sets out to solve the mystery of the killing on his own. Before long, he’s tangled in a web of corruption that reaches the highest seats of power. Beset by the suffocating secrecy and subterfuge of communist China, Stratton must find his friend’s murderer—before the fury of a brutal conspiracy closes in on him. Along with Powder Burn and Trap Line, this international mystery is one of the early suspense thrillers written by Carl Hiaasen and Bill Montalbano, a writing team praised for their “fine flair for characters and settings” (Library Journal).

Lucky You

release date: Aug 28, 2018
Lucky You
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER "Witty...colorful...entertaining." - New York Times Book Review JoLayne Lucks lives in a town infamous for its suspicious miracles, but she''s still elated when her lottery numbers finally pay off big-$28 million, to be exact. And she has great plans for her fortune: to save a rare piece of Florida paradise from the bulldozers. Only one problem: There''s another winning Lotto ticket, and the people who''ve got it just never learned how to share. When the two militia wannabes swipe JoLayne''s ticket, she enlists an off-the-rails newspaperman to help her track down the trigger-happy creeps and their bewildered hostage, a Hooters waitress. Getting rich quick is never easy...

Team Rodent

release date: Sep 29, 2010
Team Rodent
"Disney is so good at being good that it manifests an evil; so uniformly efficient and courteous, so dependably clean and conscientious, so unfailingly entertaining that it''s unreal, and therefore is an agent of pure wickedness. . . . Disney isn''t in the business of exploiting Nature so much as striving to improve upon it, constantly fine-tuning God''s work." --from TEAM RODENT TEAM RODENT How Disney Devours America "Revulsion is good. Revulsion is healthy. Each of us has limits, unarticulated boundaries of taste and tolerance, and sometimes we forget where they are. Peep Land is here to remind us; a fixed compass point by which we can govern our private behavior. Because being grossed out is essential to the human experience; without a perceived depravity, we''d have nothing against which to gauge the advance or decline of culture; our art, our music, our cinema, our books. Without sleaze, the yardstick shrinks at both ends. Team Rodent doesn''t believe in sleaze, however, nor in old-fashioned revulsion. Square in the middle is where it wants us all to be, dependable consumers with predictable attitudes. The message, never stated but avuncularly implied, is that America''s values ought to reflect those of the Walt Disney Company, and not the other way around." BONUS: This edition includes an excerpt from Carl Hiaasen''s Bad Monkey.

Strip Tease

release date: Aug 18, 2010
Strip Tease
Only in America could an innocent, if drunken, guest of honor at a strip joint bachelor party become a mortal threat against Big Money and Big Government. Only in south Florida, land of roadside honky-tonks and sinister pleasure boats—not to mention blackmail and murder—would a virtuous topless dancer join forces with a cool but clueless cop. And only in the fiction of Carl Hiaasen do readers experience riveting suspense and razor-sharp characters along with the most wicked humor imaginable. This is Strip Tease, Hiaasen’s most inventive tale yet of savage appetites and sweet justice. BONUS: This edition includes an excerpt from Carl Hiaasen''s Bad Monkey.

Native Tongue

release date: Aug 18, 2010
Native Tongue
From the New York Times bestselling author comes a novel in which dedicated, if somewhat demented, environmentalists battle sleazy real estate developers in the Florida Keys. "Rips, zips, hurtles, keeping us turning the pages at breakfinger pace." —New York Times Book Review When the precious clue-tongued mango voles at the Amazing Kingdom of Thrills on North Key Largo are stolen by heartless, ruthless thugs, Joe Winder wants to uncover why, and find the voles. Joe is lately a PR man for the Amazing Kingdom theme park, but now that the voles are gone, Winder is dragged along in their wake through a series of weird and lethal events that begin with the sleazy real-estate agent/villain Francis X. Kingsbury and can end only one way....

Assume the Worst

release date: Apr 10, 2018
Assume the Worst
This is the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate''s future. And what he or she can or can''t do about it. "This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That''s not what you need. You need a warning." So begins Carl Hiaasen''s attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: nobody. Illustrated by bestselling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner Roz Chast, this book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it''s also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

Star Island

release date: Jul 27, 2010
Star Island
Meet twenty-two-year-old Cherry Pye (née Cheryl Bunterman), a pop star since she was fourteen—and about to attempt a comeback from her latest drug-and-alcohol disaster. Now meet Cherry again: in the person of her “undercover stunt double,” Ann DeLusia. Ann portrays Cherry whenever the singer is too “indisposed”—meaning wasted—to go out in public. And it is Ann-mistaken-for-Cherry who is kidnapped from a South Beach hotel by obsessed paparazzo Bang Abbott. Now the challenge for Cherry’s handlers (über–stage mother; horndog record producer; nipped, tucked, and Botoxed twin publicists; weed whacker–wielding bodyguard) is to rescue Ann while keeping her existence a secret from Cherry’s public—and from Cherry herself. The situation is more complicated than they know. Ann has had a bewitching encounter with Skink—the unhinged former governor of Florida living wild in a mangrove swamp—and now he’s heading for Miami to find her . . . Will Bang Abbott achieve his fantasy of a lucrative private photo session with Cherry Pye? Will Cherry sober up in time to lip-synch her way through her concert tour? Will Skink track down Ann DeLusia before Cherry’s motley posse does? All will be revealed in this hilarious spin on life in the celebrity fast lane. BONUS: This edition includes an excerpt from Carl Hiaasen''s Bad Monkey.

Skin Tight

release date: Jan 05, 2010
Skin Tight
Bestselling author Carl Hiaasen serves up a humorous helping of "taut, fast-paced action...crisp and hot” (The New York Times). After dispatching a pistol-packing intruder from his home with the help of a stuffed Marlin head, Mick Stranahan can''t deny that someone is out to get him. His now-deceased intruder carries no I.D., and as a former Florida state investigator, Stranahan knows there are plenty of potential culprits. His long list of enemies includes an off point hit man, a personal injury lawyer of billboard fame, a notoriously irritating TV journalist, and a fumbling plastic surgeon. Now, if he wants to keep fishing into his golden years, Stranahan has no choice but to come out of retirement to close this one last case...

Scat

release date: Jan 27, 2009
Scat
Carl Hiaasen takes us deep in the Everglades with an eccentric eco-avenger, a ticked-off panther, and two kids on a mission to find their missing teacher. Florida—where the animals are wild and the people are wilder! Bunny Starch, the most feared biology teacher ever, is missing. She disappeared after a school field trip to Black Vine Swamp. And, to be honest, the kids in her class are relieved. But when the principal tries to tell the students that Mrs. Starch has been called away on a "family emergency," Nick and Marta just don''t buy it. No, they figure the class delinquent, Smoke, has something to do with her disappearance. And he does! But not in the way they think. There''s a lot more going on in Black Vine Swamp than any one player in this twisted tale can see. It’s all about to hit the fan, and when it does, the bad guys better scat. “Ingenious . . . Scat won’t disappoint Hiaasenphiles of any age.” —The New York Times “Woohoo! It’s time for another trip to Florida—screwy, gorgeous Florida, with its swamps and scammers and strange creatures (two- and four-legged). Our guide, of course, is Carl Hiaasen.” —DenverPost.com

The Downhill Lie

release date: Jan 01, 2009
The Downhill Lie
Recounts the author''s return to golf after quitting the game in college, describing how he purchased a set of clubs, practiced for eighteen long months, and agreed to compete in a tournament against much more talented players.

Skink No Surrender

release date: Sep 11, 2014
Skink No Surrender
A New York Times bestseller and laugh out loud thriller from Carl Hiaasen about a missing cousin, a half-crazy governor, giant gators and justice -- swamp justice, that is. Typical Malley - to avoid being shipped off to boarding school, she takes off with some guy she met online. Poor Richard - he knows his cousin''s in trouble before she does. Wild Skink - he''s a ragged, one-eyed ex-governor of Florida, and enough of a renegade to think he can track Malley down. With Richard riding shotgun, the unlikely pair scour the state, undaunted by blinding storms, crazed pigs, flying bullets and giant gators. Carl Hiaasen first introduced readers to Skink more than 25 years ago in DOUBLE WHAMMY, and he quickly became Hiaasen''s most iconic and beloved character, appearing in six novels to date. Both teens and adults will be thrilled to catch sight of the elusive ''governor'' as he pursues his own unique brand of swamp justice. With Skink at the wheel, the search for a missing girl is both nail-bitingly tense and laugh-out-loud funny.
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