New Release Books by Doogie Horner

“Full of wit and wisdom, and riotously funny to boot. A phenomenal debut!” —Ransom Riggs, New York Times bestselling author of Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children “As irreverent as it is gratifying.” —David Arnold, New York Times bestselling author of Kids of Appetite and Mosquitoland A grieving teen faces dangerous classmates, reckless friends, and the one-year anniversary of his sister’s devastating death in this poignant, quirky, often humorous novel that’s perfect for fans of Jeff Zentner and Brendan Kiely. Kirby Burns is about to have the second worst day of his life. Tomorrow is the one-year anniversary of the worst day of his life, and in the three hundred and sixty-four days since then he hasn’t stopped running: from his family, his memories, and the horse-sized farm dogs that chase him to the bus stop every morning. But he can’t run forever, and Kirby and his friends PJ and Jake sneak out of his house to play a prank with consequences that follow them to school the next day, causing a chain reaction of mayhem and disaster. It’s a story that’s touching and funny, an authentic meditation on the pain of loss, and the challenge of getting paint to stick to cows.

A delightful Christmas storybook for adults based on the action-packed Die Hard movie All John McClane wants for Christmas is to reunite with his estranged family. But when his wife’s office holiday party turns into a deadly hostage situation, he has to save her life before he can get home in time for Christmas! The unconventional fan-favorite movie Die Hard is now an illustrated storybook—complete with machine guns, European terrorists, and a cop who’s forced to rely on all his cunning and skills (and the help of a fellow officer) to save the day. Based on the classic “Night Before Christmas” poem and filled with whimsical illustrations, this cleverly reimagined homage is destined to become a holiday classic. *Contains adult material including violence and strong language. Reader discretion is advised. Ho-ho-ho.

A completely original and funny new take on cats. Doogie Horner, a writer and illustrator, knows just what it is about cats that so obsesses and delights us—their impenetrable personalities, their self-contained quirkiness, the aura of mystery that makes it seem as if they’re always up to something that they don’t want us to know about. So he imagines their secret lives for us, in a way that takes the most surprising and whimsical turns. With full-color illustrations and absurdly funny short stories, Some Very Interesting Cats Perhaps You Weren’t Aware Of is a gallery of 100 impossible cat characters. Like the Alien cat, Xort, who reports back to his planet: “Have trained my humans to feed and pet me. They suspect nothing.” Or the Mountain Climber cat, Snowball, who is planning a perilous route up the North Curtain to Mt. Bookcase. Or Mystico, the Magician cat—no one could figure out how he sawed a dog in half. (The answer was simple: He didn’t like dogs.) And Hjalmar, the Viking cat, whose motto is “Pillage. Tuna. Plunder. Nap.”

Cut two eyeholes out of a bed sheet, and BOO! You've scared yourself up a classic Halloween icon. But what does that ghost look like when he's shy? Or in love? Or a pirate, a llama, a bond villain, or Russian nesting doll? 100 Ghosts explores every sort of spook in a series of whimsically haunting illustrations. It's a delightful collection for adults, children, and anyone in need of a friendly fright.

Everything Explained Through Flowcharts is packed with meticulously designed charts that trace the labyrinthine connections that order the universe, illuminate life's great mysteries, and cause eye strain in senior citizens. Swiss scientists at the prestigious University of Helsinki have said that Everything Explained Through Flowcharts is the closest thing there is to a working unified field theory, and have gone on to claim that they aren't Swiss, aren't scientists, and aren't sure whether or not Helsinki is in Switzerland. And yet the Swiss consulate has not denied that this book contains more than two hundred illustrations, forty mammoth charts, and innumerable supporting graphs and essays, including: An illustrated matrix of WWF Finishing Moves Heavy metal band names taxonomy The noble art of zeppelin warfare demystified How to win any argument Tragedy to comedy conversion chart for comedians A creepy drawing of a baby skeleton How to tell if you're an evil twin

"After a spill at the science fair turns Stan and Gene invisible, one boy uses his powers for good while the other makes trouble"--