Most Popular Books by John Gottman

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • LEARN THE 5 SECRETS OF SUCCESSFUL COUPLES Conflict is the top reason couples seek help—but it''s also an opportunity for greater intimacy, deeper connection, and lasting love according to this essential guide from the world’s leading relationship scientists and authors of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and Eight Dates. “An indispensable resource that couples will use over and over again.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone How we fight predicts the future of our relationships. Most of us blunder into conflict without knowing what we are really fighting about and then quickly become overwhelmed by physiological responses we can’t control and emotions we don’t anticipate. The truth is the happiest and most successful couples fight—all the time. Conflict is human, and necessary. Through decades of research, Drs. John and Julie Gottman, founders of the world-famous Love Lab, have identified the five common mistakes we make when we are at odds. In Fight Right, we learn the five secrets that help us to get back on track and harness conflict to build stronger, healthier relationships. With kindness, clarity, and a deep understanding of the struggles couples are going through, the Gottmans show us that we each have a unique conflict culture, borne of how we were raised and how we experienced past relationships, and they take us through all the possible combinations, from Avoiders, to Validators, to Volatiles, and how they can best work together. Fight Right is an essential resource that will help couples escape the win-or-lose mentality in favor of a collaborative approach: calming down, staying connected, and really understanding, so that our fights can bring us closer.

What you can learn from the breakthrough research to make your marriage last.

INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER “This book feels so hopeful because it’s direct, it’s really honest, and it’s so actionable.” —Brene Brown From New York Times–bestselling authors Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, a simple yet powerful plan to transform your relationship in seven days What makes love last? Why does one couple stay together forever, while another falls apart? And most importantly, is there a scientific formula for love? Drs. John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman are the world’s leading relationship scientists. For the past forty years, they have been studying love. They’ve gathered data on over three thousand couples, looking at everything from their body language to the way they converse to their stress hormone levels. Their goal: to identify the building blocks of love. The Love Prescription distills their life’s work into a bite-size, seven-day action plan with easy, immediately actionable steps. There will be no grand gestures and no big, hard conversations. There’s nothing to buy or do to prepare. Anyone can do this, from any starting point. The seven-day prescription will lead you through these exercises: Day 1: Make Contact Day 2: Ask a Big Question Day 3: Say Thank You Day 4: Give a Real Compliment Day 5: Ask for What You Need Day 6: Reach Out and Touch Day 7: Declare a Date Night There is a formula for a good relationship, and this book will show you how a few small changes can fundamentally transform your relationship for the better.

One of the foremost relationship experts applies the insights of science toward understanding the real meaning of trust between a couple and suggests a new approach to handle adultery.

Strengthen and deepen your love with a fun, ingenious program of eight life-changing conversations—on essential topics such as money, sex, and trust—from two of the world’s leading marriage researchers and clinicians. Navigating the challenges of long-term commitment takes effort—and it just got simpler, with this empowering, step-by-step guide to communicating about the things that matter most to you and your partner. Drawing on forty years of research from their world-famous Love Lab, Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman invite couples on eight fun, easy, and profoundly rewarding dates, each one focused on a make-or-break issue: trust, conflict, sex, money, family, adventure, spirituality, and dreams. Interactive activities and prompts provide motivation to stay open, stay curious, and, most of all, stay talking to each other. And the range—from the four skills you need for intimate conversation (including Put Into Words What You Are Feeling) to tips on being honest about your needs, while also validating your partner’s own emotions—will resonate, whether you’re newly together or a longtime couple looking to fortify your bond. You will discover (or rediscover) your partner like never before—and be able to realize your hopes and dreams for the love you desire and deserve.

A great "philosopher" once said, "Trying to understand women is like trying to smell the color 9." But the fact is, men can understand women to their great benefit. All they need is the right teacher. And arguably there is no better teacher than John Gottman, PhD, a world-renowned relationships researcher and author of the bestselling 7 principles of Making Marriage Work. His new book, written with wife Julie Gottman, a clinical psychologist, and Doug Abrams and Rachel Carlton Abrams, MD, is based on 40 years of scientific study, much of it gleaned from the Gottman''s popular couple''s workshops and the "love lab" at the University of Washington. It''s written primarily for men because new research suggests that it is the man in a relationship who wields the most influence to make it great or screw it up beyond repair. The Man''s Guide to Women offers the science-based answers to the question: What do women really want in a man? The book explains the hallmarks of manhood that most women find attractive, and helps men hone those skills to be the man she desires.

Congratulations! You have a new baby. Don’t forget you also have a marriage. Having a baby is a joyous experience, but even the best relationships are strained during the transition from duo to trio. In And Baby Makes Three, Love Lab™ experts John Gottman and Julie Schwartz Gottman teach couples the skills needed to maintain healthy marriages, so partners can avoid the pitfalls of parenthood by: • Focusing on intimacy and romance • Replacing an atmosphere of criticism and irritability with one of appreciation • Preventing postpartum depression • Creating a home environment that nurtures physical, emotional, and mental health, as well as cognitive and behavioral development for your baby Complete with exercises that separate the “master” from the “disaster” couples, And Baby Makes Three helps new parents positively manage the strain that comes along with their bundle of joy.